Parenting: Teaching Integrity

Dinner Topics for Tuesday

Honesty and Integrity: Parenting Value for July

Richard and Linda Eyre


family7gardeningIntegrity with other individuals, with institutions, with society, with self. The inner strength and confidence that is bred by exacting truthfulness and trustworthiness.


How can we teach our children to develop the inner strength and confidence that is bred by exacting truthfulness, trustworthiness, and integrity? How can we help our children avoid the common childhood tendencies to stretch the truth, to exaggerate, to rationalize, and to tell the little lies that often lead to bigger ones? Can small children develop the early integrity that will help them become honorable, dependable adults? Can elementary-age kids learn the direct, look-you-in-the-eye truthfulness that will win them respect and confidence? Can adolescents communicate candidly with parents?

Review the activities and stories that go along with this months value. Make sure everyone in your family understands the value so they can see how they can apply it in their own lives and situations.

Talk about the Monthly Value every morning and remind your family to look for opportunities to use the value throughout the day. They may also observe how others don’t understand the value. Get your children to share their experience with the value each day at the dinner table or before you go to bed. Be sure to share your experience each day as well. It will help your children know that you are thinking about the value too.


Methods for teaching honesty


Integrity with other individuals, with institutions, with society, with self. The inner strength and confidence that is bred by exacting truthfulness and trustworthiness.

Method for Preschoolers: The Honesty About Feelings Game

This will help small children realize that feelings are caused by what has happened — and that it is okay to feel things and okay to tell others honestly how we feel. Go through a magazine (one with lots of ads and colored pictures) and point at faces saying, “How do you think he feels?” Then say, “Why do you think he feels that way?” Then say, “Is it okay to feel that way?”

Help children to identify feelings and their probable causes and to know that it’s okay to feel those things and to tell other people how they feel.

Method for Elementary Age: The Honesty Under Pressure Award

This is a motivational way to get children to evaluate their personal honesty every week. On Sundays (or whatever day you most often get your whole family together for a meal) ask, “Who had a situation this past week where it was a challenge to be honest?” Have an “award” on hand to give to the person who remembers the best incident of being honest. A piece of construction paper or colored card with a neatly printed H.U.P. (Honesty Under Pressure) will do nicely as the award. Let the child (or adult) who wins put it on his bedroom door during the week until it is awarded again the next week.

After a couple of weeks of “getting used to,” you will find that children are thinking hard about their behavior of the past week in hopes of winning the award. And it is this kind of thinking and recognition that strongly reinforces honesty.

Method for Adolescents: Share Your Own Honesty Dilemmas

This can help demonstrate to older children that you are willing to be honest with them — even about your own struggles. Be brave enough to tell your children about times when you have had a hard time being honest. Tell them “positive” incidents when you were honest and negative ones when you weren’t — and tell them about any current situations where you are struggling to be completely honest.

This kind of sharing is quite a compliment to your older children because it expresses your confidence in their maturity. Nothing will inspire more trust from them or encourage them more to share their struggles with you.



Paul Ryan Facts: Honesty Missing in Paul Ryan the Politician

Paul Ryan Facts: Honesty Missing in Paul Ryan the Politician

Paul Ryan was not endorsed by Freedom Caucus

Exclusive: Paul Ryan Sold House Freedom Caucus a Bill of Goods in Private Meeting on Capitol Hill

paul-ryanIn the private meeting inside the House Ways and Means Committee hearing room in the U.S. Capitol on Wednesday afternoon, chairman

(Rep. Paul Ryan (R-WI) 58% conservative voting score “F”)

promised the House Freedom Caucus the world to try to earn their official endorsement. He failed.


He reiterated his promise made in the full GOP conference on Tuesday of no amnesty bill under President Obama—which conspicuously did not extend to the next president—and an end to crisis-to-crisis governance under outgoing Speaker

Rep. John Boehner (R-OH)37% conservative voting score “F”)

. He also promised more “regional representation” rather than representation centralized in the Speaker’s office.

gop-betrayal-backstabThere were only two catches to Ryan’s litany of promises: first, those present couldn’t tell the public what just happened because, Ryan argued, it would infuriate the other side of the House GOP conference. And Ryan would get what he wanted with significant changes to a House rule that was put in place back in the early 1800s by Founding Father Thomas Jefferson, America’s third president and the author of America’s Declaration of Independence from King George.

That rule of course allows any member to offer a “motion to vacate the chair” as a privileged resolution—allowing members to, if a Speaker is out of control, as Boehner has been, remove a Speaker from power. Ryan wants to severely undercut the power of rank-and-file members to hold a Speaker accountable with a motion to vacate the chair; Ryan’s spokesman has said that no Speaker can “be successful with this weapon pointed at them all the time.” So he wants to keep members from being able to use it whenever necessary, essentially ending the original intent Jefferson had with the check and balance.

So, heading into the meeting with Ryan—which began just after 4 p.m. on Wednesday—there was near-unanimous opposition to Ryan in the House Freedom Caucus. Like Breitbart News, Fox News’ Chad Pergram reported that it was “unlikely” that Ryan received the endorsement of the Freedom Caucus. Almost every member, save for a few like Reps.

Rep. Mark Sanford (R-SC) (86% B) and Rep. Marlin Stutzman (R-IN) 82% B), opposed a Ryan Speakership—and they were agreeing to the meeting simply to be fair. But when Ryan made all these promises to them in there, many of the members believed him at face value.

Ryan’s spokesman Brendan Buck—is a former Boehner staffer.

dishonesty1Several of the members worry that Ryan is untrustworthy and dishonest—given the misleading nature of the way he has sold Republicans in the past on Obamatrade, “doc fix,” the budget deal he cut with Sen. Patty Murray (D-WA)0%, immigration, and many more issues. Thus, if he moves forward with a bid for the House Speakership after failing to receive the endorsement of the House Freedom Caucus–something he and his office said they would not do–even members in the Freedom Caucus who would have supported him will have reason to believe that Ryan is entirely untrustworthy and dishonest and withdraw their previous support for him.

It remains to be seen what happens next, but Politico is reporting that Ryan may move forward with a Speakership bid—meaning his first move after the Freedom Caucus withheld an endorsement of him would be breaking a promise to them.