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Moral Character Education: Parenting Advice, How to Teach Kids Self-Reliance

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Moral Character Education: Parenting Advice, How to Teach Kids Self-Reliance Resilience—Spiritual Armor for Today’s Youth By Lynn G. Robbins Our children are capable of thriving in the face of today’s challenges. Our charge as parents is to help prepare them … Continue reading

Parenting Tips: Self Government, Teaching Children to Enjoy Work

Parenting Tips:

Self Government, Teaching Children to Enjoy Work

How to Help Kids Enjoy Doing Work!

Nicholeen Peck

Work as a Means to Freedom and Happiness

Samuel Smiles, a philosopher/historian who lived in the 1800s, said, “Work is one of the best educators of practical character…Work is…the living principle that carries men and nations onward…All must work in one way or another, if they would enjoy life as it ought to be enjoyed…All that is great in man comes through work, and civilization is its product. Were labor abolished, the race of Adam were at once stricken by moral death.

Work as a Negative Consequence

Part of the self-government approach to family communication that I teach is the importance of teaching cause and effect. This helps children take ownership of their own behaviors. To do this I recommend using extra chores as negative consequences. Do that instead of taking things away from children, or physically or emotionally manipulating them.

Little housekeeping fairy girl tired of home chores – doing the dishes

One of the most common questions I get regarding work is “Won’t my child hate work if work is used as a negative consequence? I want my child to like work.”

In recent years, a theory has been propagated that doing work as a negative consequence can make a person hate work. This simply isn’t true.

Natural consequences and synthetic consequences both teach cause and effect, which is essential for learning self-government. Natural consequences always need to be brought to the child’s attention. But, due to how children are wired, synthetic consequences are often required to be more consistent with teaching and decreasing manipulation of parenting systems by the children.

Parents can use whatever synthetic consequences they want and fit all their other parenting principles to those consequences, but we’ve found multiple reasons why work is best. 

First, Smiles said, “work is the antidote for a sick character.” When a child won’t follow instructions or accept “No” answers from their parents, the child’s character is sick. The child is forgetting his role and the duty associated with it.

Second, to really learn self-government, children have to take full responsibility for their progress, skills, and course corrections. When children accept a negative consequence in the teaching self-government system, they never do it with a bad attitude. If they have a bad attitude, they’re not allowed to accept the consequence yet. Children end up wanting to accept their consequence when they understand the system. If children don’t choose to accept their consequence, they can’t learn self-government. So, you won’t have grumpy children doing chores. If parents just take things or opportunities away from their children for synthetic negative consequences, then the parents are just joining the power struggles and hoping to have the upper hand.

Third, of all the synthetic consequences we’ve ever used with children, extra chores create the least amount of anxiety and naturally increase confidence the most. They’re also the most merciful because they can be done quickly, allowing children to forget the negative moment in their life and move on. When parents take away a toy or friend time, or something like that for a simple instruction not being followed (like making the bed or cleaning the room), then the negative consequence has to follow children around for a long time — even when they already complied with the instruction and cleaned the room and had a change of heart. Once a chore is done, that’s it. Nothing follows them around all day to remind them how bad they were.

Fourth, work is only bad if parents present work as bad or think of work as bad themselves. We don’t consider work or negative consequences as bad at our house. Since we already work together for hours daily as a family and enjoy that time, and since we all have daily chores that are part of life, and since our children regularly take on large adult work type projects of their own accord, then when a little extra job is earned they don’t see it as bad. To them, it’s just a simple consequence that was earned that they need to acknowledge and quickly complete. Most times, it’s hardly even a burden to them.

When children have already been taught that work is good, then an extra job is the easiest and most merciful consequence they could have. So, a deliberate parent presents work positively to their children as part of their family culture in order for them to choose to like work. Even if parents don’t choose to use chores as negative consequences, they’ll want to make sure work is seen as a good thing at their house.

 

https://teachingselfgovernment.com/parenting-blog/how-help-kids-enjoy-doing-work/

Heritage Foundation: Voter Fraud Cases, Parenting Advice

Dinner Topics for Wednesday

Heritage Foundation report:

Truth-Detectors

Don’t Believe Voter Fraud Happens? Here’s Some Voter Fraud Cases

Hans von Spakovsky

voting-voteIn the interest of helping out the editorial writers and pundits of media outlets who don’t think voter fraud occurs, I wanted to note just a few recent cases (and readers interested in seeing almost 200 more such cases can do so here.):

  • In McAllen, Texas, two campaign workers (known as politiqueras in local parlance) who bribed voters with cocaine, beer, cigarettes and cash during a 2012 school board election have been sentenced separately to serve eight and four months in prison, respectively. U.S. District Court Judge Randy Crane called this election fraud “terrible” and said that “our country requires that our voting process be clear and free of fraud for democracy to work … it’s dangerous for this to occur without consequence.”
  • A couple in Le Sueur, Minn., was charged with felony voter registration fraud for lying about where they lived so they could vote in a school bond referendum in another town.
  • A woman in Dothan, Ala., was sentenced to six months in prison for her part in a voter fraud scheme that got a city commissioner re-elected. She was the second of the four people charged to have been found guilty of voter fraud in the case, which may have involved more than 100 absentee ballots.
  • Bronx politician Hector Ramirez has been arrested after a 242-count grand jury indictment charged him with a massive voter fraud scheme that involved tricking voters into letting Ramirez and his staff illegally vote their absentee ballots. The local prosecutor told the New York Daily News that Ramirez, who lost two prior tries at a state assembly seat, “made a decision that he was not going to lose, under any circumstance.”
  • A state appeals court upheld a ruling voiding a 2013 commission election in Weslaco, Texas, in which dozens of illegal votes were cast in an election won by only 16 votes. The illegal votes included individuals falsely claiming to reside in the city and improper “assistance” that told voters who to vote for—a great example of how even a small amount of fraud can make a difference in close elections.
  • In Philadelphia, the setting of the infamous 2008 New Black Panther Party voter intimidation case, four local election officials have been charged with casting multiple votes in the city’s 18th Ward in a precinct in which three of them didn’t even live and were not registered to vote. This case illustrates the importance of poll watchers, because it was a local poll watcher who saw what happened and brought it to the attention of the district attorney’s office. This is the same district attorney, Democrat Seth Williams, who indicted two Democratic state legislators last year for accepting bribes in exchange for voting against a voter ID bill after the Pennsylvania attorney general, Kathleen Kane, also a Democrat, refused to prosecute the case.
  • On May 7, the Board of Immigration Appeals of the Executive Office for Immigration Review held that a Peruvian citizen who illegally registered and voted could be deported for violating federal law. Margarita Del Pilar became a permanent legal resident of the U.S. in 2004. She promptly applied for an Illinois driver’s license and registered to vote at the same time, then cast a ballot in the 2006 congressional election. When she applied for naturalization in 2007, she admitted in the INS interview that she had voted in an American election. Of course, if she had not applied to become a citizen, she could have continued to illegally vote with almost no chance of being detected.

This case of the Peruvian woman is just another example of how easy it is for noncitizens to vote in our elections. And there are apparently some politicians who want to ensure that they can continue to do so without getting caught.

Solutions

One recommendation I have made to state legislatures is to implement legislation that requires court clerks to notify state election officials when individuals called for jury duty are excused because they are not U.S. citizens. Courts get their jury lists from voter registration rolls, and it is a requirement that those who register to vote affirm under oath they are U.S. citizens. Individuals called for jury duty also have to affirm, again under oath, that they are U.S. citizens. And yet in a 2005 study, the U.S. Government Accountability Office found that 3 percent of the 30,000 individuals called for jury duty from voter registration rolls over a two-year period in just one U.S. district court were not U.S. citizens.

The Virginia legislature recently passed a common-sense election reform bill (HB 1315), which would have required county jury commissioners to provide local election officials with the names of individuals called for jury duty who turned out to not be U.S. citizens. Local registrars could then remove those illegally registered voters and provide information to local law enforcement and the U.S. Justice Department for investigation and possible prosecution.

We know this is a problem in Virginia, where I formerly served on a local county electoral board. As I have explained previously, we fortuitously discovered in 2011 that 278 individuals who were not U.S. citizens had registered to vote in Fairfax County, 117 of whom had voted in state and federal elections. After removing them from the voter rolls, we notified both the U.S. Justice Department and the local district attorney about the problem. Neither did anything about it.

Yet Virginia Gov. Terry McAuliffe, a former fundraiser for the Clintons, vetoed this bill on April 30. There is not a single public policy reason for vetoing such simple, straightforward legislation—unless you want to ensure that noncitizens can continue to register and vote illegally in Virginia elections with little fear of being discovered, particularly if you believe that a majority of these individuals will support your party’s candidates. Virginia is, after all, now a purple state and every vote will count in the 2016 presidential election.

Parenting Advice from Daughter of Transgender Parent:

As I know from firsthand experience, all children—including those being adopted—deserve a mom and a dad.

Denise Shick

Consider the Impact on Children

As a culture we are very willing to address the emotional distress, isolation and other negative issues of people who come out as transgender adults. But we have not even begun to discuss the issues involved and the impact this has on their wives and children.

familydefend1I’m begging America to wake up to what is being done for the sake of society and for children worldwide! This cultural celebration of transgenderism, for me as a daughter of a transgender father, is misguided and insensitive.

In our country’s most recent challenge regarding gay marriage, six adult children raised in same-sex or transgender households came forward to address the importance they placed on having both a mother and a father.

I  wonder if anyone is listening to the voices of the adult children that should count and be heard.

As I know from firsthand experience, all children—including those being adopted—deserve a mom and a dad.

Read More:

Repentant Transgender Warns Jenner: The ‘Hangover’ Is Coming

truth2momentAmidst the media euphoria surrounding the former Bruce Jenner’s gender reassignment surgery and cover photo on Vanity Fair, a 74-year-old transsexual who deeply regrets his decision has come forward to caution those who think that transgenderism solves people’s psychosexual problems.

Walt Heyer, now reverted to his male identity and married to his wife for 18 years, spends his energy raising public awareness of the disastrous penalties of gender reassignment.

“‘Its consequences include early mortality, regret, mental illness, and suicide.'” It’s exactly what the Johns Hopkins doctor said.  He said the suicide rate among transgenders is 20 times the suicide rate for people who are not transgendered, or we can say the general population.

“Clinical studies would seem to confirm Heyer’s conclusions. A review of more than 100 international medical studies of post-operative transgenders carried out in the UK in 2004 found ‘no robust scientific evidence that gender reassignment surgery is clinically effective.'”

Heyer’s essay here sounds exactly like what that doctor at Johns Hopkins says about this, that it’s a mental illness, it’s a mental disease, and it needs treatment, compassion, and therapy; that it isn’t possible. There’s no such thing as changing your gender. It’s all a myth, and it’s not healthy. It isn’t good, and we ought not be celebrating it.  I pointed this out some months ago, and I’m surprised. (Rush Limbaugh)

Parenting Advice from Repentant Transgender

“Instead of encouraging them to undergo unnecessary and destructive surgery, let’s affirm and love our young people just the way they are,” Heyer wrote.

Heyer has little patience for “enlightened” parents who think they are doing their children a favor by playing up their confusion and catering to their “dreams of being the opposite gender.” Though motivated by a desire to be open-minded and supportive, this parental behavior is ultimately destructive, says Heyer.

Read more